Name of Ritual

Comb-splitting 分梳

Description of Ritual/Practice

• The nam mo lo leads the ritual and family member(s) help to comb the deceased hair. After which, the wooden comb is split into 2. One half is kept in the coffin while the other is given to the family to be disposed of. This splitting of the comb signifies that the marriage is over/the relationship has been severed and the surviving spouse is free to move on.
• If the deceased is male: when the wife puts both pieces back into the coffin, she is declaring her intention to remain a widow for the rest of her life. If she only puts one piece in and throws the other half away, it signifies the breaking of the relationship and gives her the freedom to remarry.
• If the deceased is female: the surviving husband puts a red flower into the deceased’s hair (which may have some connection to the saying of 死在夫前一朵花 which means she has had a good life to pass before her husband); there is no demand for him to remain a widower.

Who practices it? Who conducts the ritual?

Family members, surviving spouse, ritual specialists such as the nam mo lo

Is it still practiced now?

This ritual is rarely performed in Singapore now due to 1) NEA regulations regarding the handling of the body and 2) changing attitudes about marriage and expectations of women.

Other interesting notes

We get the sense that women may be pressured to put both pieces of the comb in the coffin since everyone at the funeral will be watching her. It reflects an outdated view that women should continue to be in mourning and uphold a “widow’s chastity”. Any attempts to move on is frowned upon while the man is allowed to remarry without social disapproval. A funeral director shared with us that they don’t approve of this practice as it places too much pressure on the surviving wife.